Appreciates her help getting through scrapes during years at the university. Now another one. Keeps making a fool of herself! Keeps trying on personas (the scholarly, the bohemian)! Would consider suicide but knows her stupidities spring from liking someone too well. People always watching her, waiting for her to do something unusual. Feels superficial and useless where she is. Little brother Jack is the one consolation. Has been to a dance with Douglass and actually enjoyed it. Miner girls there. Met a Miss [Anna] Gayhardt and talked all night. Can't talk like this to Katharine [Weston], of course. Hopes to get up to Lincoln soon. Professor Bates very happy in his new job. Willa [Stout #24]
Has been in this grimy city only a few hours. Began feeling happier when she got east of Chicago and started seeing hills and clear streams and trees. Conductor asked if she was going home. Was met by Mr. Axtell. For now, is staying at the Axtells' gloomy house, where the only ornament is a drawing of someone's grandfather. At least their library has some novels (tame ones), and Mrs. Axtell has Harper's magazine. Using daughter's room while she is away; room has three Bibles and an E. P. Roe novel. Willa [Stout #25]
Presbyterian Axtells not so stern as first thought, but not much fun. Their social life limited to fellow church members! Summoned the Baptist minister from next door as soon as they learned the Cathers were Baptists. Has been to an organ recital at Carnegie music hall, which shares a building with library and art museum; theater next door. Between going to church and pretending to know Wild West stories, is losing all standards of truth. Magazine is dull stuff, but is practically the managing editor, with her own desk. Willa [Stout #27]
Sorry for previous letter. Ironic to be called bohemian, considering present hardworking life. Has been on a picnic to Erie and an excursion on the river; returning by moonlight, admired the glow of the steel furnaces and was serenaded by a Princeton boy. Recited college composition on Carlyle at an afternoon tea and was at once welcomed into the social set. Axtells are kind but not warm; resemble the Pounds. Willa [Stout #29]
Enjoyed Saturday evening. Probably will not see them again before she leaves. Jack will enjoy the brownies [rubber stamp] being sent by Erna [Seibels' baby]. Willa Cather [Stout #38]
Would like to stop off in Lincoln before going on home. So much to tell! P.S.: Will be at the Canfields' in Columbus on the way. Willa [Stout #39]
Probably will not go back to Pittsburgh until September. Magazine has been sold. Will try to get a newspaper job. Afraid Mr. Seibel has not been paid. Jack enjoying the brownies [rubber] stamp. Is going hunting with older brother in August. Is sending Erna [Seibels' baby] a spoon. P.S.: Has been reading Charles Lamb's Dramatic Essays. Willa Cather [Stout #40]
Has received Erna's picture. Is impressed that Mr. Seibel has acquired a complete set of Hugo, but they will envy her "Thistle" Stevenson. Has not yet retrieved manuscripts from Axtell and Orr. Beware of Christians! But is attending church with her family. Leaving on hunting trip today. Has a cold. Willa Cather [Stout #41]
Roscoe has been ill, but needs money worse than he needs her presence. How nice it is to have independence! Life has a lot of variety these days. Mr. Farrar broke his leg but is still capable of fun. Mrs. Canfield and Dorothy visited during Christmas. Turned the tables by introducing them to society. Many parties, including a dinner for Ethelbert Nevin. Has met interesting people—Anthony Hope Hopkins, F. Marion Crawford, Fridtjof Nansen. Went shopping with Nevin today, and he bought her a bunch of violets. Willa [Stout #47]
Writing on family's behalf. Will be at home until first of October; having lots of fun. Is leaving for a ten-day hunting trip near Big Horn with Roscoe. Douglass handsomer than ever. Would like to demonstrate what good gin cocktails she can make. Hopes to produce a book of essays about the theater next winter. Plans to return to Pittsburgh because of job. Refused offer from the New York Sun that would have meant night work. Has had a happy year. Willa Cather [Stout #50]
