Appreciates her help getting through scrapes during years at the university. Now another one. Keeps making a fool of herself! Keeps trying on personas (the scholarly, the bohemian)! Would consider suicide but knows her stupidities spring from liking someone too well. People always watching her, waiting for her to do something unusual. Feels superficial and useless where she is. Little brother Jack is the one consolation. Has been to a dance with Douglass and actually enjoyed it. Miner girls there. Met a Miss [Anna] Gayhardt and talked all night. Can't talk like this to Katharine [Weston], of course. Hopes to get up to Lincoln soon. Professor Bates very happy in his new job. Willa [Stout #24]
Has been in this grimy city only a few hours. Began feeling happier when she got east of Chicago and started seeing hills and clear streams and trees. Conductor asked if she was going home. Was met by Mr. Axtell. For now, is staying at the Axtells' gloomy house, where the only ornament is a drawing of someone's grandfather. At least their library has some novels (tame ones), and Mrs. Axtell has Harper's magazine. Using daughter's room while she is away; room has three Bibles and an E. P. Roe novel. Willa [Stout #25]
Presbyterian Axtells not so stern as first thought, but not much fun. Their social life limited to fellow church members! Summoned the Baptist minister from next door as soon as they learned the Cathers were Baptists. Has been to an organ recital at Carnegie music hall, which shares a building with library and art museum; theater next door. Between going to church and pretending to know Wild West stories, is losing all standards of truth. Magazine is dull stuff, but is practically the managing editor, with her own desk. Willa [Stout #27]
Will use his article on Richard Wagner. Willa Cather [Stout #30]
Would Friday do this week instead of Thursday? Willa Cather [Stout #32]
Won't be able to come on Thursday, as it is Thanksgiving and already has a commitment. Will visit next week. Willa Cather [Stout #33]
Enclosing check for $6 for his article on the Star of Bethlehem. "A Higher Critic" will be in March issue, also for $6. Willa Cather [Stout #35]
Is sending a valentine written by Ella Golden [?] in dialect. Willa S. C. [Stout #36]
Enjoyed Saturday evening. Probably will not see them again before she leaves. Jack will enjoy the brownies [rubber stamp] being sent by Erna [Seibels' baby]. Willa Cather [Stout #38]
Probably will not go back to Pittsburgh until September. Magazine has been sold. Will try to get a newspaper job. Afraid Mr. Seibel has not been paid. Jack enjoying the brownies [rubber] stamp. Is going hunting with older brother in August. Is sending Erna [Seibels' baby] a spoon. P.S.: Has been reading Charles Lamb's Dramatic Essays. Willa Cather [Stout #40]